Hullo, Flora Poste

The difference between these people and me is that they finished college and I didn't (they didn't split up with Charlie and I did); as a consequence, they have smart jobs and I have a scruffy job, they are rich and I am poor, they are self.confident and I am incontinent, they do no smoke and I do, they have opinions and I have lists.

• Rainbow Rowell's Fangirl, fanfiction, my swelling heart and fic recs


• Emotional distance in reading and Sarah Rees Brennan's Unspoken and Untold, with extra fic recs


• Rainbow Rowell's Eleanor & Park


• ALL SHOEBOX THINGS (aka I've been rererererererererererereading The Shoebox Project and I have tears to prove it) (with extra, extra quotes)


• Emotional reading, YA and how not to connect with 'literary fiction'


• Why I can't read my book club picks (even when I get to choose the book)


• Easy-to-read vs slow books. The 'Books in my Nook' categorization debacle.


• Now that I think about it, how categorization helps and sucks and makes me very uncomfortable


• On my lack of book blog assertiveness, a list in progress

It is difficult to return to reading space adventure stories in a series where one has seen one’s heart wrenched from one’s chest and put back in differently...

• Arctic Dreams by wldnst
  AU. ~5.000 palabras. Arthur es un biólogo marino. Eames es su rival, pero no lo sabe.
  

  Arthur’s one consolation is that someone who studies the biggest fish in the world and then switches to whales with giant tusks growing out their jaws has got to be compensating for something.




• Discovery by solvent
  Lawyer!AU. ~15.000 palabras. Arthur consigue el trabajo leguleyo de sus sueños sólo para descubrir que se había acostado con su jefe. Shut up.
  

  He looked at himself in the mirror – serious face, serious suit, tight jaw. He looked like a lawyer, he assured himself. It still took him another ten minutes to leave.




• I've Got Nothing To Do Today But Smile (The Only Living Boy In New York) by gyzym
  Lawyer!AU. ~20.000 palabras. Arthur es vilmente explotado por el aparato burocrático. Eames es dueño de una cafetería.
  

  "Today is the day that Arthur grins like an idiot and laughs and blushes and advises people on the amount of vanilla in their scones," Yusuf says. "May 22, everyone. Mark your calendars."
  
  Eames, because he's a bastard, actually marks the calendar.




• I Bet Nureyev Never Had To Deal With This Shit by cobweb_diamond
  BALLET!AU FTW. ~20.000 palabrasEames, Mal y Arthur son los bailarines principales de... uh... una compañía de ballet en Londres.
  

  ‘OK, fine. What’s this... ritual?’ he asks, wary. People can get a little crazy when it comes to opening night.
  
  ‘Well, first I must get my bikini area waxed,’ says Mal. ‘And then, we watch Die Hard!’
  
  Arthur is still stuck on that first part. ‘I’m... sorry?’
  
  ‘It's a necessary part of preparing for the show,’ explains Mal, as if it’s perfectly obvious.
  
  ‘And... Eames joins in?’
  
  Eames grins. ‘I pour her wine. To dull the pain.’
  
  There are so many disturbing elements to this idea that Arthur doesn't know where to begin. ‘Has anyone ever told you two that your partnership is weirdly close?’ he wonders. ‘Doesn’t Dom mind?’
  
  ‘Dom is like an insane person before opening night,’ says Mal. ‘And besides, I suspect he thinks women are naturally smooth and hairless like beautiful, polished jewels. It’s charming.’




• Jamais Vu by thehoyden
  Creo que este es el único no AU de la lista. ~7.000 palabras. Yusuf prueba un nuevo compuesto en Arthur. Eames se beneficia.
  

  "I'm not sure what this is supposed to prove," Arthur temporizes.
  
  "Shush, darling, this is for science," Eames says, and creases the page of the Cosmopolitan magazine he is holding. "'The second time you go out with a guy you like, he wears an ugly shirt he says his mother bought for him. Do you think A.) he's a mama's boy and there will be no date number three--'"
  
  "Seriously, what is this?" Arthur asks.
  
  "A quiz entitled, 'Are You Way Too Picky When It Comes to Guys'," Eames says. "You haven't heard your other two options. 'B.) Well, everyone should get one fashion break, or C.) It's cute that he loves her enough to wear it.'"




• Pagina Uno by pyrimidine
  AU. ~6.000 palabras. Arthur es un bibliotecario, Eames es el usuario con las mæs altas multas en la historia de la biblioteca.
  

  “Mr. Eames. I’m not your English teacher. I’m not a sounding board for your pedestrian thoughts and I’m not here to pat you on the back for having a first grader’s analysis on Faulkner’s style. I’m calling because you apparently have over forty overdue books on your account here,” Arthur bites out.
  
  There’s a pause.
  
  “Quite an impressive eyebrow and mustache combination, though,” says Eames, as if he’s having an entirely different conversation. “Faulkner, I mean.”




• Roll The Dice by the_ragnarok
  Highschool!AU. ~8.000 palabras. Todos juegan Rol.
  

  Arthur's willing to admit he's being a little petty. So he tried extra hard for a friendly smile. "So Eames talked you into joining us?"
  
  She snorts. "Yeah, more like I wheedled at him to let me come along. I've tried to organize a game with my anime club, but it ended up dissolving into sparkles and yaoi."




• Early Returns by rageprufrock
  NEWSPAPER!AU. ~15.000 palabras. I fucking love this one. Arthur es editor, Eames es el periodista investigativo, juntos luchan contra el mal. O algo así.
  

  "Leave me alone," Arthur had said, because at that moment, that had literally been the only thing in the world he wanted. He'd been left as an injury and overlooked for ages as further insult, and he didn't want Eames to make it up to him; he wanted to stew in his self-pity and indulge in some much-deserved loathing and never, never have sex with anybody again.
  
  "Oh, Arthur," Eames had said, sounding hollowed-out.
  
  At which point Mal had proven her worth as a friend and hurled Dom's ASNE award out of his office window, shattering the glass and making such a fantastic racket that all attempts at having feelings in other corners in the newsroom screeched to a halt.




• Spin! by weatherfront
  POLITICAL!AU. ~21.000 palabras. Este fic es la razón por la que comencé a ver The West Wing. Arthur y Eames son los directores de campaña de Dom y Mal, respectivamente. Juntos combaten el mal.
  

  Like manna from heaven, a salad drops into his lap. The halved cherry tomatoes glisten at him, technicolor crimson, nestled on beds of curling parmesan. Succulent as the painted lips of a Rita Hayworth, he thinks, and then, what the fuck am I even saying.
  
  Dazed, Arthur lifts the fork and guides it to his mouth. The sweet-salty dressing is a balm to his burning tongue. He nearly sobs at the sensation of relief that floods him, the crunch of arugula stalks between his teeth, and all at once he's ravenous for more. It's only after another hurried shovel or two that he remembers he hasn't thanked his benefactor yet.
  
  He looks up, sees who it is, and promptly chokes on his mouthful of salad.
  
  "What are you doing here," he shouts. "Cobb, what is he doing here."
  
  "I'm a spy," says Eames, proudly.
  
  "I knew it," yells Arthur.




• Run to Daylight by whiskyrunner
  AU. Este es la secuela de otro fanfic que nunca releo porque es tan, tan, TAN angustiante. Este es angustiante, pero por diferentes motivos y el final no me hace llorar (tanto), so... Eames es el jugador estrella de un equipo de fútbol americano. Arthur es periodista deportivo. Juntos son IDIOTAS Y ME HACEN SUFRIR D:



• Under the Steinway by toomuchplor
  AU (por supuesto). Millones y millones de palabras. Eames es un genio musical igual de encantador que Pavarotti, pero joven y estudiante y flaco e imposiblemente inglés. Arthur es un estudiante de piano en la misma escuela. Juntos componen mi fanfic favorito de TODO el fandom de Inception.
  

  It's the Beethoven, it's giving Arthur trouble. It feels, actually, as though Beethoven himself is giving Arthur trouble. The dynamics in the sonata Arthur's learning are wildly wrong, and Arthur is pitching a battle with the long-dead composer, trying over and over to make the written dynamics make any kind of sense to him when he can't agree with a single one.
  
  "It's not a soft section," Arthur tells Beethoven, speaking into the soft cream paper of his worn Henle edition. "It's not, it should be at least mezzo-forte."
  
  Beethoven's pp marking -- pianissimo, very soft -- glares back at Arthur.
  
  "Look, I know you're a genius and everything," Arthur tries, "but I'm telling you, you fucked this one up, Ludwig."
  
  pp, says the score.
  
  "Fuck you," Arthur says, and sweeps the book to the floor, crashes through the offending section as loudly as he can, playing badly and with obnoxious volume, over and over. On the fifth or sixth repetition, the low A flat suddenly emits a cracking noise and falls silent. Arthur lifts his hands, startled. This is a sound he's never heard from a piano in his whole life.
  
  Arthur stands and peers under the piano's lid. He's actually snapped the piano string of the offending note -- one of the two, anyway. The broken wire isn't curled up like in a cartoon, it's just listing sadly across its tautly pulled brothers, loose and useless and pitiful.
  
  "Fine," Arthur says to the piano's insides. "Fine, you win, you dead asshole."




• What's A Little Contract Between Friends by laceymcbain
  Otro no-AU! Arthur, sin querer, contrata a TODOS LOS MERCENARIOS DEL MUNDO para que asesinen a Eames.
  

  Eames had been off the grid for more than a month, not answering calls or texts or emails.
  
  Arthur had started to think he was going to have to send up smoke signals. Possibly by burning Eames' London flat to the ground. So he'd made a few calls. (A lot of calls.) Casual enquiries. (A thorough and methodical search of all Eames' known contacts.) Just to let people know he wanted to talk to Eames. (Badly. Very badly.) Perhaps he'd sounded a little desperate. (He may have promised money and favors in return for information, or better yet, Eames.)
  
  In retrospect, Arthur can see how his actions might have been misinterpreted.




• The Wingman by whiskyrunner
  AU. ~17.000 palabras. Arthur es obsesivo compulsivo. Eames intenta conquistarlo con un perro gay.
  

  Sam jogs with him every day after that.
  
  The sun comes up earlier, the weather gets warmer, and he starts meeting more people on his route, fellow joggers and dog-walkers. Once upon a happy time he lived a nice, anonymous lifestyle in this neighbourhood. Now, to his horror, he finds his identity caught in a bizarre transition from anonymous jogger to Sam-And-Sam's-Dad.
  
  “He's not my dog,” he has to tell everyone who asks, at first. But soon they get used to the sight of Eames strolling around with the easily-recognizable dog at his heels, and then Arthur becomes Sam-And-Sam's-Dad's-Boyfriend.
  
  Which is so, so much worse.

'Must have facts,' said Lord Peter, 'facts. When I was a small boy I always hated facts. Though of 'em as nasty, hard things, all knobs. Uncompromisin'.'

'Yes, my lord. My old mother--'

'Your mother, Bunter? I didn't know you had one. I always imagined you were turned out ready-made so to speak. 'Scuse me. Infernally rude of me. Beg your pardon, I'm sure?'

'Not at all, my lord. My mother lives in Kent, my lord, next Maidstone. Seventy-five, my lord, and an extremely active woman for her years, if you'll excuse my mentioning it. I was one of seven.'

'That is an invention, Bunter. I know better. You are unique. But I interrupted you. You were goin' to tell me about your mother.'

'She always says, my lord, that facts are like cows. If you look them in the face hard enough they generally run away. She is a very courageous woman, my lord.'
Clouds of Witness, Dorothy L. Sayers.